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Alice and her donor friend also had numerous, lengthy conversations about their expectations, spanning his family’s medical history, what his role would and wouldn’t consist of as the donor and how his family would be involved in the child’s life. They also had a conference call with his parents and sister to help clear up misunderstandings about the donor-child relationship they’d decided on. “I was glad we had the conversation,” she says. “They've been a wonderful, gentle presence throughout [the child’s life].”

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